Most people overthink their first purchase. They spend weeks reading, comparing, second-guessing—then either buy something wrong or buy nothing at all. This guide cuts through that.

Start With One Thing

The most common mistake is buying too much too soon. One toy, used correctly, teaches you more than a cart full of things you’re not ready for. Start with something beginner-appropriate, learn your body, then expand.

If you’re not sure what that one thing should be, take the Find Your Toy Quiz. It’s 60 seconds and gives you a real recommendation based on what you’re actually looking for.

Material Matters

Body-safe materials only. Everything we carry qualifies, but if you’re ever shopping elsewhere, look for:

• Medical-grade silicone — soft, non-porous, easy to clean, the safest option
• ABS plastic — firm, non-porous, compatible with all lubes
• Glass or stainless steel — firm, temperature-play capable, easy to sterilize

Avoid anything described as “jelly,” “realistic skin,” or without clear material disclosure. Those materials often contain phthalates.

Always Use Lube

This isn’t optional. Lube reduces friction, protects tissue, and makes everything more comfortable and more enjoyable. Use more than you think you need. Reapply during, not just at the start.

For silicone toys, use water-based lube only. Silicone lube degrades silicone toys over time. If you’re unsure of the material, default to water-based—it’s safe with everything. Full breakdown in the Lube Guide.

Clean Before and After

Wash with mild soap and warm water before first use and after every use. For silicone, glass, and metal toys, you can boil them or run them through a dishwasher (top rack, no detergent) for deeper sanitization. Never share toys without cleaning between uses.

Go at Your Own Pace

There’s no timeline. No correct speed. No level you’re supposed to have reached by now. The men who build the most confidence are the ones who stopped trying to match some imagined standard and started paying attention to what actually feels good for them.

Take your time. Understand your body. That’s the whole thing.